The Way I Heard It 01.13.07

.......[c]2007 by
Richard L Zorek

.........01.13.07............The Doomsday clock is going to be moved forward next week. Atomic scientists have kept the clock since about 1947. The Nuclear ambitions of Iran and North Korea, along with the feud between Rosie O Donnell and Donald Trump have brought about the need for the move forward...........................President Bush offered his new proposal for Iraq this week which involves sending more troops into Iraq to support the new Iraq army. "This will leave Rosie and Donald without support, but we have to set priorities," said Bush. ........................Actions by the Internal Revenue Service have successfully stopped the Golden Globes from handing out "Goody Bags" to "A" listers. The IRS then joyfully moved their doomday clock forward.....................Mike Tyson was arrested in Phoenix for drug possession. He then blamed the Pheonix Police Department for all the wars in history and bit some of their ears off. At least that's the way I heard it..

That's The Way I Heard It 01.11.07

.......[c]2007 by
Richard L Zorek

.........01.11.07............The US Postal Service has a new stamp issued yesterday. It's "Memorex," of course. And all this time you thought it was Ella Fitzgerald........President Bush in admitted that mistakes were made in Iraq. Democrats had been pressing him to admit there were mistakes. Now the Democrats want him to admit that his admission of mistakes is a mistake..............The House passed a federal minimum wage increase, raising it to $7.25 an hour. Majority Leader Steny Hoyer objected at first saying "We already make more than that." After it was explained that the laws they pass dont affect them, he, along with 314 members, voted for it........................Yvonne Decarlo died yesterday at age 84. She was better known to most of us as Lily Munster. See, I knew she wasn't really already dead in that show. At least that's the way I heard it...........